Since COVID-19, there have been fewer meetings with clients. The conversations that you do have, are usually by phone or online. Many consultants experience therefore a lack of contact. Sometimes you can’t read the client’s body language or sense what Is going on. In those cases, you need to pay more attention to maintaining a good and pleasant relationship with your client.
At the Senior Consultancy Skills training, we distinguish between paying attention to the content of a meeting and to the relationship.* If you ‘lose’ a clients attention, you need to switch to relationship-centred interventions. When the client shows interest again, you can switch back to the content. This principle is also effective online or by phone. If you experience a hiccup in the conversation, you need to move away from the content temporarily. Ask an open question, give recognition or be silent for a moment instead.
How do you effectively anticipate and maintain the relationship online?
The online relationship rules of the game
- Giving recognition is the greaser of contact. It is even more important online than f2f. A pleasant undertone, affirmative comments and positive evaluations of the client’s input can all help to strengthen the contact: ‘Great that you are already mentioning your concerns’, ‘I appreciate your explanation, that saves us a lot of time. Thank you’.
- People often find online silences uncomfortable. Listening-with-sound can help you with that. You can regularly make affirmative sounds. A ‘notice of receipt’ – a short recap – often proves more effective than words like ‘okay’: ‘So, we can only train in the evenings, not during the day’.
- You need to inquire more often about opinions, reactions, uncertainties etc.: ‘How does this sound so far?’, ‘You seem to be a little surprised, am I right in that? What exactly surprises you?’
- Sometimes it is useful to tell the client that you are asking more questions on purpose: ‘As I can’t see your reaction right now, can I ask you what your thoughts are on this planning?’
- If you think that a question will not get across well, provide a short introduction: ‘It might sound a bit weird, but…’, ‘I am going to ask you a strange question, if that’s alright. I do it on purpose, as…’, ‘If you don’t mind, let’s take a step back as I’d like to comment on what you said before …’.
- If it is not clearly visible that you empathize or appreciate diverting opinions and emotions, you can say so out loud. ‘You were hoping for more support’, ‘I can imagine that this is unsettling ..’.
- And, of course, anticipate personal needs: You need to ensure that Power will maintain overview and control, that Realisation gets results and urgency, and that Order experiences structure from your side, even with less contact. You may need to keep WhatsApp contact with Togetherness, keep Certainty posted on details via email and continue to give Recognition attention.
Which signals do you read?
- How does the client’s voice sound? To what extent is that voice comparable to earlier contact? To what extent does the voice match the content of their words?
- What is the atmosphere like? What mood or gut feeling do you experience during the call?
- If you notice something once, it might not have any meaning. The second time you register it, you could become more observant. A third time could mean a pattern. This would be a good moment to bring it up. This postponing would also give you some time to think about a reaction.
Make contact: Be visible and use your voice
- Position your laptop in such a way that the client sees you as if you were across from him. You can put your camera at eye level and alternately look at the client’s face and into the camera. That way, you can read facial expressions (sometimes even better that f2f) as well as give the impression that you are looking at the client. This will allow you to both focus at the client and have personal contact.
- Support your words with your voice. For example: o Really mean a compliment – and take a pause afterwards. That way, the compliment stands on its own and does not seem like a preamble to your next message.
o Let questions sound like one: let your voice go up at the end of your sentence..
o If you want to clearly state your opinions, ‘This really is the best solution’, use the intonation high-lower-low, ‘happily-ever-after’. End your sentence with a low pitch. - Alternate your voice
o With a lower pitch as your base, you seem reliable and you increase your credibility. With a higher pitch, you make contact. The combination is irresistible
o Diversify your pitch, speed, volume and the length of your breaks. You will sound lively.
- Support your words with your voice. For example: o Really mean a compliment – and take a pause afterwards. That way, the compliment stands on its own and does not seem like a preamble to your next message.
VELVET**: An acronym for virtual rules of the game for a smooth-running meeting
- • Virtual etiquette, ccommunication rules & establishing the mood – Create communication rules that ensure interaction and safety , for example: ‘Signal when you need to walk away from the meeting’
- • Emotional connection & energy – Start with a personal check-in to affirm the relationship
- • Listening with curiosity – Pay a lot of attention to words and sounds (e.g. laughing, sighing, hesitation) and ask directly. Share your own reflections.
- • Vocal presence– Use your voice to radiate energy, warmth and understanding, to connect and to have impact
- • Engaging visually – Make the meeting visually appealing by using well-designed slides and photographs of the participants or write and draw together in a document
- • Technology – Practice ahead of time with the technology, or ask a producer to assist you
* Like an exercise of Karin de Galan
**Fogelberg, F. and Tavanyar, J., Live Connections, Virtual Facilitation for High Engagement and Powerful learning, Amersfoort: Nomadic IBP, 2015